Conclusion

Well I have finally made it to the last post of this blog for Intercultural Communications. At first I was not sure what to think of this class or what I could possibly get out of it. I have to admit I have learned alot. I have learned to think about things in a different light when it comes to the communication with those of another culture. The different ways other cultures view things such as time, non-verbal vs. verbal communications, conflict resolution, and the importance of family influence in how they communicate with others both in their own culture and with those of different cultures. It has opened my eyes to the stereotyping and discrimination that is all around even though most believe these things have come to pass. I thoroughly enjoyed reading the book "The Spirit Catches You and You Fall Down". This book gave me new insight into how difficult it can be for those of different cultures to assimilate into our American culture and how we as Americans can do some pretty simple things to make this transition easier for those who are trying to adjust. From the weekly discussion questions to the quotes in the book from the author's past students I enjoyed hearing what other perceptions and feelings are toward the issues in dealing with intercultural communication.

I would recommend this class to anyone wanting to expand their knowledge of other cultures and to gain more understanding to barriers that may need to be overcome. This class is ideal for those who have or desire to have effective communication with those from other cultures. I feel that we all should embrace the diversity that surrounds us and learn to communicate with all we come in contact with so we may learn from the people and these encounters.

Racial Overcompensation?

During the time I have been blogging while taking this class I have brought up stereotyping, racial bias and discrimination quite often. This recently came to mind again during a disagreement my mother and I had over my oldest son. As I have said before he is bi-racial, his biological father being black and I being white. He also has a form of higher functioning Autism called Aspbergers Syndrome. Since I was young when I had him (19) and single she was involved quite a bit during his early childhood. At the time we lived in a small northern Wisconsin town with no other black people and most were racially biased even though they would not admit it. I believe she caused more controversy and bias by trying to defend and protect so to speak than would have happened if she would have said nothing. She has felt the need to defend him and his mixed racial background and now his Autism since his diagnosis when he was 5. She thinks that anything that goes wrong with him is caused from someone discriminating for one thing or another. She has caused undue stress in our family by pointing out to the other children that they shouldn't say this or that because he is black and it might make him feel bad. When in fact I'm pretty sure he really could care less since the comments were pretty simple. For example my 5 year old son once came home from school and said he had a new dark skinned friend. That was the way he chose to describe his new friend and my mom practically tore his head off. I believe that she has created more doubt in my son in certain ways about who he is by trying to "defend" him and who he is.

We recently argued about the medication he takes to help with some of the symptoms he has so he can be more productive in school. She does not believe he should be on any medication and said to me "They probably put all the kids with troubles on medication." and has said "The people at the school probably don't treat him the same because he's part black." This drives me crazy and I think her overcompensation tactics to try and protect him from whatever she thinks he needs protecting from is ruining our relationship as I try to protect him from her ideas.

Tiger Woods

Earlier during our weekly discussion posts we discussed Tiger Woods and how he deals with his bi-racial background and family. We determined that Tiger has been a role model to many especially minorities that anything is possible regardless of your cultural background. Tiger seemed to have a great reputation and seemed like a great golfer, dad, husband and just generally down to earth. With the recent questions surrounding his late night accident and allegations of infidelity I feel there is a lot of disappointment surrounding this. Because of his great reputation and the fact that he is a minority I think he was held up high so to speak. Now that he has broken some of his more ethical reputation of being the "great guy" will he fall into the stereotypical "bad black guy athlete" category?

Let's face it most black athletes that children look up to are usually in some kind of trouble. From sex scandals, drug addictions, alcohol problems and run ins with law enforcement it seems they are always in the news for some negative thing. Tiger was the exception to this until this point. He was the one who proved that not all black athletes were trouble makers and he was deserving to be a good role model. It is kind of sad. I still think he is a great golfer but my ethical viewing of him has decreased. Hopefully all this will pass and he can still continue to be a positive role model for some and admit what really happened.

British Pop Culture

Earlier we studied about pop culture, and as I said then up until this course I really was not sure what exactly pop culture was. Now I realize that just about everything we seen in the media and magazines along with television shows and radio broadcasts can be called popular culture. It is known that the United States is the power house when it comes to pop culture. Many movies and TV shows that are made in the United States are broadcast around the world. Where here in this country we have a channel or two with other countries television shows and programming on it. What brings this to mind was a show I ran across on an American television channel the other night. It was some type of award show for British commercials. Apparently the British are know for their very odd and entertaining commercials. They are also popular as it can be very difficult to determine what exactly they are advertising or promoting during its running time. I think it is good that some other countries are now getting a little of their popular culture into American programming.

Another great example of British popular culture being introduced into our country is that of the woman that blew everyone's mind on the British version of "America's got Talent". She has now made it to the top of the charts here in the United States and has received quite a bit of American media attention. As we start to hear of more and more international musicians and television broadcasts maybe we can start to lose the all American attitude toward pop culture.

Holidays

With the holiday season approaching quickly I have began to wonder if the whole idea of de-christmascizing so to speak in schools is really a great idea. Now I completely understand that not everyone celebrates Christmas, and that they should be allowed to celebrate whatever holiday they want but I think things have gone a little far. I work in an elementary school. There are no more kids Christmas concerts. They have purposely moved them to fall and spring to avoid the holiday season. I remember being a kid and singing all the nice Christmas songs to an audience of parents, it was just part of Christmas. There are no Christmas projects done in art class anymore, and there can't be class Christmas parties anymore, they have to be "winter" parties. There are still the couple of Christmas type projects that we can do, like making gift tags for example. But we have to make sure there is an understanding that they can be any kind of gift tags and say "you can make Christmas tags, if you celebrate that holiday." It is not OK to sing any type of Christmas song that has to do with Jesus or the real meaning behind Christmas, but it is OK to listen to the other holiday songs in different languages since no one can understand them even if they were talking about Jesus, or whatever god that holiday celebrates.

I am all about diversity, expression of ones own beliefs, and learning about all the other holidays that go on in our own country and around the world but it seems that we are no spending so much time making sure we know about and celebrate all the other holidays that we have forgotten about the one that most of us (in my school and situation) celebrate. There has to be a happy medium and at this point I think it has gone too far in the other direction.

Clash of Conflict Resolution Styles

A couple weeks ago we studies about conflict resolution. This brought back a memory of a conflict my husband and I had not too long ago about our ways of dealing with conflict. The actual argument was over something pretty silly; who had read more with our 6 year old recently. The real argument we ended up in was how we handled the fact we were both angry with each other. I tend to want to talk out the problem right away. I will tell my side and expect the other person to tell their side and hopefully if we talk it out a resolution will be decided upon. My husband tends to just not say anything but yet make is known that he is upset with you. He will remove himself for a while then purposly walk through or around what I am doing but not speak or respond to any questions. He likes the "just drop it" phrase but won't lose his attitude he has developed because of the argument. After us each trying our conflict resolution style for a hour or so there was finally the big blow up. We ended up yelling at each other about how we each handled the situation. He didn't think it was a good idea to talk about it right away and I didn't think ignoring it was helping at all. I'm not sure if either of us really accomplished anything out of the incident at all but the study of conflict resolution brought back this memory. We actually both laugh about it now and realize it was pretty silly on both our parts. We were acting the same way that we encourage our children not to all the time. I guess we all have our bad days now and then!!

Cultural Differences

While working on the group culture project I spoke for a while with one of the neighborhood kids who is Hmong. He is now 12 years old. I have known of him for years. He has played at my house with my kids, has been at my neighbor's house when I was there and I knew he was Hmong but never really thought much about it. His house is directly behind mine and I have occasionally seen his parents in the yard doing yardwork. They will always nod or wave but didn't seem to really want to talk or respond if I asked them how they were or something. I talked with the child a little since I needed an interview for the project and learned a little about him and his family. His parents immigrated here in the early 90's with his older sister and he was born in 1997. They also have two other children who are 6 and 3. We had noticed that we rarely see the children out playing and never see the parents out with the children except to chase them down when they "escape" from the house. The boy told me that his parents take good care of them but don't understand the "American" ways much. The children are expected to entertain themselves alot and the older ones have a lot of responsibility in the care of the younger ones. They expect the older kids to also teach the younger ones English as the parents speak very little. They are not allowed to be involved in any extra curricular activites and don't participate in many "american" holidays like Thanksgiving and Halloween. I did notice this year that the older sister brought the younger boys by our house trick or treating. They were not dressed up and just had grocery bags for candy.

I feel bad for these kids in some ways as they don't get the opportunity to experience alot of the things the other kids in the community get to. On the other hand, this is how their culture is used to operating. The parents are not used to having sports and activities available and in their past the care of the younger children has fallen on that of the older ones since they worked long hours farming or working. It would be nice if there could be a meeting place in the middle where they could experience some of what is available but yet hold onto their cultural heritage and beliefs at the same time.

Intercultural Relationships

Recently we talked about what differences there may be between intercultural and intracultural relationships. I feel there are many more challenges that a couple may face if involved in an intercultural relationship. There are still many people out there that do not agree with this type of relationship and those involved in one find themselves constantly defending their relationship. I was involved in a relationship with a black man earlier in my life. (I am white) This resulted in my first child. Unfortunately the person I was involved with chose not to participate in his sons life and I have been raising a bi-racial child without any real insight into the other side of his history or culture. When my son was 3 I married my now husband who is white. We have 3 other children and we get constant questions about my son, since he is obviously different from our other children.

I feel that a person should have the right to be in a relationship with whomever they choose without having to worry about what others may think. If people choose to enter into these relationships it can only make them a stronger more well rounded person. There is learning about the other person, their background and embracing of the cultural differences in our country. This should be celebrated not looked down upon.

Conflict resolution

Recently in class we took a survey to determine our conflict resolution type. I thought the survey was pretty close to how I actually handle conflict. It told me that in both immediate and long term I was primarily "collaborative", but usually do not avoid the situation. This is completely true. I tend to try and talk out any problems or conflicts I am having with someone. I think that unless everyone has given their opinion and thoughts into the particular situation there really is no way to resolve the situation. Once everyone involved is aware of where others stand then everyone can hopefully talk it out to come to an agreement. Maybe one person (including yourself) may have seen the situation in a different light and that affected their response. Maybe not everyone had all the information to make a correct decision and so on. I have tried to teach this to my children as well. With 4 kids ranging in age from 2 to 12, we have constant conflict in our house over some pretty interesting things. I encourage my kids to explain how they see the situation and how they feel and try to get the others perspective. Then they need to try and talk it out amongst themselves before involved my husband or I as long as it's not a dangerous situation. I have been surprised how well they have done with this. So much easier than us trying to mediate for every he took this, she did that.

The survey also showed that I don't avoid a conflict either. I cannot feel peaceful if I know that I have an unresolved conflict going on somewhere or with someone. I will work hard to resolve whatever needs to be resolved so that everything can be "smooth sailing" once again. Therefore avoiding the conflict just wouldn't work real well for me. This isn't necessarily a good thing because I think there are things that are better left alone, but I just can't do it because it drives me crazy.

Cultural Cuisine

Earlier in this course we were assigned a paper that required us to eat at a restaurant from a different culture that we had never tried before. When I first discovered this I was quite nervous. I will admit that I am a picky eater and don't venture outside my "normal" foods very often. I did some research and got some advise from friends and co-workers and my husband and I decided to eat at Sawatdee Thai restaurant. We both ended up really enjoying the meal and I learned a lot about the culture and history of the Thai people during the visit as well. Even though the restaurant itself didn't look any different than your normal restaurant from the initial impression, there were a lot of pieces of history and culture inside. The one thing I remember most is the hand carved table at the cash register. It was a beautiful table with a farm type scene carved out of the top in great detail. Upon asking the cashier it was carved by an ancestor of the owner of the restaurant years ago. I find it very amazing and heartwarming that people that have immigrated to the United States take such pride in their history and enjoy sharing it with others both through the cuisine and artifacts they display.

I bring up this topic because my husband an I have a night out planned for tomorrow evening and have decided to go back to this restaurant. We both plan on trying something different than we had the first time, but us returning shows that not only was the food good but the atmosphere was welcoming as well. We tend to stay in our own comfort zone and this proves that you can still feel good about exploring other things that are out there.

Popular Culture Conflict

Recently in class discussion we were given the information on the University of North Dakota and the controversy surrounding its choice of mascot, which is an Indian chief head. They are called the Fighting Sioux. The explanation from the university is that it is meant as a respect toward to the Sioux Indian nation and their heritage in North Dakota. There has been controversy over the use of native American logos and mascots in sports for a while. There have been people that have taken it too a negative tone and caused uncomfortable surroundings for those who are of Sioux heritage. Does this mean that the school should not be allowed to use this logo or team name? I don't personally think so. If the name and logo is truly meant in a positive light toward that group then it should stay that way. Those who choose to inappropriately use it or mock it should be disciplined and it should be very clear that negative approaches to this are strictly not allowed. As some people noted in discussion, there doesn't seem to be an issue when it comes to Notre Dame and the Fighting Irish. Sometimes I think assuring there is no discrimination to minorities can go too far. In fact it could be seen as discrimination to some that there is always so much effort made to make sure no one of another culture is offended when there may really not be a problem to begin with. I think the Fighting Sioux and any other team should be able to keep their logo and team name. If there are those that can't handle the true meaning behind the choice of a native American or other cultural team or logo than they are the ones who should be punished. The association probably doesn't want anyone like that to be associated with them anyway.

Non-verbal Communication

Tonight after finishing up dinner with my family I began my nightly homework rounds with the 3 of my 4 children that are in school. The first grader was pretty easy, read a short book and initial that he read it. My older son had no homework tonight so that was easy. All was going well until I hit my 12 year old, 7th grade daughter. She was whining and complaining about a science assignment. I sat down and tried to help her but she wasn't listening and was frustrated. When I finally gave up and said "you obviously don't want my help, you'll have to finish it on your own." She yells " I never said that!". This brought back the memory of our discussion in class over non verbal communication. Her eye rolling, grunting at everything I said and resistance to do what I asked to make it easier communicated to me her unwillingness to accept my help even though she never had to say it. I then found myself giving her a lecture on non verbal communication. I gave examples of how the same phrase coming out of a persons mouth can mean many, many different things depending on their body language. If a person were to say "I'm having a great time!" but their arms were crossed or their body was slumped the person they were talking to would obviously know that they really were not having a great time. I then continued on with how if a person says one thing with words but their body or facial expressions show something else that who ever is being spoken to will usually take the action over the words. I made her try it out in various scenarios. She reluctantly complied at first but then began to loosen up and actually was having fun by the end. This then led to us having a much better time completing her science assignment. Here is a good example of how what I am learning in school has impacted my family life as well.

Popular Culture influences

This week in class we discussed popular culture. Up until this point I don't think I really understood what pop culture was. I had heard the term many times but really never understood what it was. I now know that virtually everything we watch on television and read in magazines and newspapers is considered pop culture along with many other things. After realizing exactly what pop culture was I now also realize how influential it can be in determining how a person views another culture or social group. If you do not have any experience or exposure to a particular group virtually all the information and ideas you have about this group comes from what you may see or read. For example if I watched a program about Ethiopia and its people that portrayed the country as poor and its people famished and uneducated that is the view I will have toward Ethiopian people. I have never been to Ethiopia nor do I know any Ethiopian people. After watching this program however I may have a clouded perception as to what the country and people are like.

It also seems that American pop culture is most prevalent even in other countries. This can be bad as well. To those who are not from America or do not know much about this country what they may see on American television shows is what they perceive as "American". So therefore if a person were to watch an American sit com they may think that all Americans have affairs behind their spouses backs and that everyone finds it funny is some sense. If they listen to rap music they may think that there is rampant crime and drug use. The impact of popular culture is huge when it comes to how other cultures view another.

Reverse Stereotyping??

Since starting this class I have realized more than ever the stereotyping, bias and discrimination that is present all around us all the time. Over the past couple months I have noticed something that is a little different than the typical stereotyping one would see. As I have said before I work as a nurse in a medically fragile/multiple impairments program in a school. This year we have 4 students two are sisters with pretty significant cognitive disabilities that are African American and come from a home with 8 children. This family lives off of public assistance and neither the mom or her current live in boyfriend work outside the home. We have a severely handicapped student who comes from a very large family. Most of her 11 siblings have special needs and are adopted. The last child has is categorized on the autism spectrum, as well as cognitively impaired and is non verbal but does communicate some with sounds and gestures. He comes from a white middle class home. I have given this detailed background as it pertains to the story. The teacher in our class is white and was born and raised in the U.S. in a Catholic family. She traveled to Morocco in her early twenties and ended up marrying a Muslim Moroccan man while there. She has since converted to the Muslim religion, but does not dress in the traditional attire and still does celebrate some christian holidays with her family. She is probably one of the least discriminatory people I know when it comes to those of other backgrounds. It is very interesting in that she is most upset usually with the middle class white parents that we deal with. We have communication problems with all the parents in our class. Some don't even bother to go through their children's work or send in snacks or lunch money. Others talk big but do little. When it comes to the African American family or the one with the many adopted special needs kids she is very accommodating and usually comes up with a reason as to why they may not be responding to our notes or calls. However, when it comes to the middle class white family she is constantly complaining about their lack of communication and unresponsiveness. Why is this? Is it really just another way of stereotyping? I think it may be. She may have the stereotype in her head that says the African American family doesn't participate as much because they are lower class African Americans. The other family is very very busy with their many children with special needs. There is the assumption that the middle class white family should be taking care of things appropriately because of their so called status. This should not be the family that is considered difficult to deal with because of this.
The teacher I am speaking of acknowledges this and can't pinpoint why it is she feels this way. She even said, jokingly "Maybe if I imagined they were Mexican or Asian I wouldn't feel so negatively toward them." This could be a case of taking anti-discrimination and negative stereotyping of minorities to the extreme.

Culture Clash

In class we have just finished reading the book titled "The Spirit Catches You and You Fall Down" by Anne Fadiman. After reading this book it has opened my eyes to the major crisis in health care in regards to dealing with those from different cultural backgrounds. In this case it was that of a Hmong family and their child who had severe epilepsy. I have worked in the health care field for over 5 years and have realized during that time there was an issue at times when dealing with those who may have a different culture or language. There were those in the clinic that you assumed understood the directions and just kind of shrugged when they left and hoped they did. There was the time when one of our female doctors had left for an emergency and a male doctor took her patients for the afternoon. There was a Somali woman that was scheduled and we had to wait for 45 minutes for her husband to arrive since in their culture a male doctor is not allowed to examine a female patient without a male family member present. At the time it just seemed like another strange thing that some patients from different cultures did. After reading this book I have a whole new outlook.

The parents of this young girl in the book had no clue how anything in the United States worked. They knew their own beliefs and cultural practices and when these clashed with the modern American medical system tragedy struck in many ways. The family did not understand what was going on when the invasive tests were being performed on her. They did not follow the orders for medications and treatments at home. They did not understand. To them epilepsy had occurred to their daughter when her soul was scared away. They had their own traditional Hmong ways of treating this, which were not going to cure her medically at all however not one medical staff ever asked or tried to understand where they were coming from. If this had happened there could have possibly been a compromise made. If there was some effort taken out to ensure a translator was available there may not have been so many misunderstandings. I could go on and on about what went wrong. The point being is that having people in our country of many different cultures and backgrounds is not going to change. There needs to be some sort of collaboration between the biomedical culture and that of the patient so that a desirable outcome is achieved by all. It may not be the ideal situation but at least everyone will be satisfied. Now I am a full advocate for the education of immigrants of the English language and the practices of our country, but we cannot expect people who are living here to completely do away with their own history and culture just because they now live in America.

Class Differences

In this course we have talked on a couple occasions about socioeconomic class and how it relates to communication. We have determined that most in American society don't really like to talk about class or like to acknowledge that there are drastic differences in how people are treated based on class status. Class usually refers to the amount of money a person makes or has access to and people tend to not discuss their financial status publically. This is fine, but when the differences in class begin to cause discrimination and stereotyping a problem begins to occur.

As I have said before, I work in a suburban school district as a classroom nurse in the medical impairments program. This year we got two new students that had previously been in a more inner city school district. This is a family that I guess would be considered "low class" compared to most others in the school. Their clothes are not as nice, they receive free lunches and they talk with some slang and "city"talk as I have heard others say. They are two of maybe a handful of African American kids in this school. As the year has progressed I have noticed the different ways both students and staff have acted around these kids. At first I thought it may have been curiosity and getting adjusted to someone new, but now I am beginning to realize that it is also "class" stereotyping as well. The parents of these kids don't have a car all the time, are unable to pay for them to participate in school activities and field trips, and are not involved in the school as most other parents are. I have heard other staff members say "how can they live?", and kids ask them why they are never at any extracurricular activities. The kids are honest and say "We don't have a car" or " My mom ain't got not money." The other kids are shocked and then shy away and snicker back and forth. I get quite frustrated that instead of coming up with ways to help these kids out people tend to just step away and talk about them and their parents behind their backs. I do understand to some point that the parents could be a little more active with their children, try and find a job to get extra money, and so on but the kids should not have to suffer from this either. I think if people were just more open-minded and stepped outside their own safety zone to try and help others they may realize there is a whole lot more going on that they could help with. If the other parents would follow their kids would then realize that not everyone is quite as fortunate as they may be.

Communication in Clothing

In the latest chapter we have read for class we discovered the importance of non verbal communication in our daily lives. I discovered how clothing can be a persons way of non-verbally communicating themselves. I had of course realized that people dressed in different ways but had never really thought of it as a form of non verbal communication. If you walk into a busy mall on any given day you can see many, many different kinds of dress that people are wearing. A person also can get some information about a person simply based on their dress. The most obvious that many in my group talked about were Somalian and Muslim women. They wear the long dresses and head coverings. This can be both a way of communicating their religion and cultural background. If you see an Indian woman in her traditional Indian dress with the shawl and bright colors you know they are expressing their Indian heritage in their clothing. There are many other choices in clothing that "speak"a persons culture and/or religion such as Jewish, African or Native American.

There are also many variations that the American culture has come up with. You see the teenage girls who are trying to show off as much of their bodies as possible without being naked. There is the grunge look and the goth look. Dark clothing, makeup and lots of piercings and maybe tattoos. There are the people that dress up fancy all the time trying to show their "class'. You will see the conservative people dressed in long skirts, pants and shirt sleeves. The list could go on and on. The point being that people can communicate a lot about themselves, their likes, and their way of life just by the clothing they choose to put on each day. I never really thought about how much a person can reveal about themselves through their dress.

Importance of Family History

This week in class we have been discussing a person's history and how it relates to communication. I discovered during this how important knowing of your personal family history can be to a person. I know very little about my family history. From what I have gathered it just didn't seem important to my family. Although I was raised primarily by my mother I actually know the most about my fathers history than my mom's, and even that is minimal. After reading the text and reading some discussion from my classmates I realize this is an important thing for me to be missing. Having a knowledge of where your family came from and the struggles or triumphs they endured can really impact how a person feels about themselves and their family. It gives a sense of pride to have a story to pass down to your own children and information to share in daily life regarding your past. It can also help to bring a family closer together by giving them a historical tie to reminisce about and feel proud of. There can also be a sense of belonging to a particular group such as a religious background or ethnic identity. I know nothing of where my ancestors came from except for the fact that my paternal grandmother was of Navajo descent. I was raised with really no religious affiliation. My mother has an atheist view toward religion whereas my maternal grandmother said she was Lutheran although I never saw or heard of her going to church. These were the two most influential people in my lives while growing up and it left me confused as to what to believe religiously. I saw my friends going to church and participating in the activities their churches offered and I thought that was something I would like. Just to feel like I belonged to a group of some kind or had some type of community to relate to.

I have now realized how important having a "story" can be to a person. I try to gather as much information about my husband's and my families so my kids can have as much historical information on our family as possible. I try to make sure that we are involved in our community and groups so they can feel that sense of belonging that I did not as a child.

Ethnocentrism in the media.

I was watching television last night and was shocked to hear a particular advertisement that gives a perfect example of the ethnocentrism that is present in the media today. It was an ad for a cell phone company. The general idea of the ad was to promote that this company now offers free unlimited calling to all mobile phones regardless of what company it was. Then their spokesperson says something to the effect of " Since we live in the freest country in the world why shouldn't we have the freest cell phone plan." The comment that we live in the freest country in the world is a blatant example of ethnocentrism. Who is to say that the United States is the freest country in the world. Do we have more freedom that that of other democratic countries? The people of this country seem to think that we are better than everyone else. They seem to look down upon anything or anyone that may act different or have different values or cultures than they do. Just because a different country may have a different type of government or ethical system that does not make us any better than them? I don't think so.
Comments like this that are made in something as simple as a TV advertisement are what continues to fuel the ethnocentric view of many in our country. A message of diversity, cultural awareness, and global awareness should be portrayed instead. If our children are raised hearing these kind of messages on television how are they going to react when they get to school or into another social situation that involves different countries and cultures? Will they automatically assume they are better than everyone else because they are American? Probably so if the media continues to portray these types of messages.

Stereotyping

I work as a nurse in a public elementary school in the suburbs. This school is in a pretty affluent neighborhood and has a very small number of minority students. All of the staff is white and seem to be pretty well off. This year we got two new students into our special education program that are bussed to our school as their home school does not offer the programming they need. They are black and until this year were going to school in Minneapolis. I have been amazed at the stereotyping that has been going on toward these kids' parents since these girls have arrived at our school. The teachers put on a good front to the other students and toward the kids themselves but when its just the adults around their real thoughts sure show.

On the first day of school these kids showed up with nothing, no backpack, no supplies and had not eaten breakfast. Instantly their parents were not good parents, were lazy, and were "not real bright." The second day still they had nothing and no breakfast was given to them before school. I actually overheard a staff member saying "They obviously spend whatever money they have on looks and not important things for their kids like food." This was aimed at their appearance. The kids have their hair done nicely and braided and someone informed us all that that "costs a lot of money" to do. So most of the staff that are involved with these kids have now stereotyped these people based upon the fact that they are black, came from an inner city school, get free lunches, and didn't come with supplies. They have never met the parents and most have never even talked with them on the phone. In the end it turns out that at their old school all supplies were provided, there was a breakfast program, the mom does hair braiding out of her home for extra money (that's why their hair looks so nice) and they are the parents to 8 children all with special needs. This is a perfect example of how negative stereotyping and ethnocentrism can give a negative light to something that is actually quite good.

The Peace Imperative

After beginning my study of intercultural communications we began discussing different imperatives in studying intercultural communications. The peace imperative was particularly interesting to me as I have thought about this particular thing many times throughout my life. The basic question is : Can people with different cultures, religious beliefs, races etc.. live peacefully with one another? Obviously not, as there are countless wars and battles between countries, cities, religious groups and so on based upon one group not liking what the other believes. This has always been very hard to understand for me. I was raised to be very open minded and unbiased about anyone who may be "different" from me in any way. This was a hard concept for my mom to instill in me since I grew up in a very small town in northern Wisconsin that was far from diverse. As I grew older and began to pay attention to what these wars and fighting were supposedly about it really bothered me. It seems to always come down to one group fighting another over differences in one thing or another. Why is this? Would the world really be a good place if everyone thought the same way, had the same beliefs, and came from the same cultural background. I don't think so. The world is as awesome as it is because of all of these differences. Even in the United States, the diversity is what makes it a wonderful place. The different foods that are available, the stories you hear from other cultures, the many different choices in merchandise, and countless other things are what make life fun and interesting. I cannot understand why billions of dollars are spent and many, many lives are lost each year over nonsense fighting. That is money that could be spent for the millions of people in poverty in the world and lives that could be spent sharing culture and diversity. The popular question "Why can't we all just get along?" certainly comes into play here. This is certainly a topic that is not going to be solved any time soon if ever at all but hopefully little by little open minds and open communication can help some.

Hello, My name is Carrie Nelson and this will be my blog for the Intercultural Communications class that I am currently taking. I look forward to sharing my experiences as I progress through this course. I am hoping this course will give me new insight in how to most effectively communicate with people from all different cultures and backgrounds in my job and day to day life. I currently work in the health care field and come in constant contact with people from many different cultures and ethnic backgrounds and sometimes feel that I am not communicating with them completely effectively. This may be due to a language barrier, cultural differences or possibly in the form of communication being used. Communicating effectively with others in my neighborhood and community is also important. I have children and they play with the other children in the neighborhood, some of which are from different cultures. My family and I have discovered that something as simple as playing with a friend from down the street can be impacted depending on the cultural background of the other child and their family. The level of parental supervision, whether to ring the doorbell or just walk in, and asking versus just doing are all things that can be different. I am excited to gain new knowledge and skills to help open the doors to more effective communication with all the different people I come in contact with both professionally and personally.